Size Matters And Other Things To Love About Vientiane

You guys, I am driving in Vientiane. I know this might not sound like a big deal but, trust me, it is.

Our driver has been very sick, so I’ve had little choice but to face my fears and tackle the rutted roads. And when I say rutted, I am in no way exaggerating. It’s the middle of the rainy season and you pretty much need a four-wheel-drive to get down the road to our house. This is what happened on our lane (three times) the other day to some unwary trucks…

And while we’re showing random photos, this is a woman fishing in the rice paddies right outside our gate.

In the last two days I have mustered up my courage and ventured further afield than the grocery store and Dominic’s pre-school. Yesterday, I drove myself somewhere brand new for an appointment. Mike helped me map out the route before hand. Here are the instructions we wrote down:

 At the electricity company with the elephants on the lawn, veer left.
You’ll pass a lot of barber shops and the gates to a big temple.
After the big temple gates, you’ll see a sign for grilled goat. Take the next right.
Take the third road to the right.
At the end of the dirt road you’ll see a big set of wooden gates.

 This sort of “landmarking” is how we navigate everywhere in Vientiane. The directions worked perfectly but that didn’t make the journey totally stress free. Later that day I had the following conversation with Mike.

 Me: “So, when I was coming home today, I got to the orange roundabout. The cars already in the roundabout, turning left, were stopped, giving way to me. I was going straight through so I kept going. But then when I was already inside the roundabout, someone coming in from the right didn’t stop and he almost hit me. What gives?”

 Mike: “Were they driving a bigger car?”

 Me: “Yes. Maybe. Maybe a little bigger. Not much.”

 Mike: “Then he wins. You should have given way, even if you were already in the roundabout. That’s just the system here.”

 Me: “That’s ridiculous.”

 Mike: “Size matters, honey.”

 Indeed.

So it’s been a while since I updated you all. We’ve been back almost three months now. We’re definitely more settled, but I still feel like we’re taking it week by week (and in some cases day by day).

Just in the last four weeks…

Mike has had giardia.

Alex and I both came down with nasty 10-day colds.

Dominic caught gastro during his first week at preschool and was up vomiting all night on his birthday. And then again the next night.

Our driver’s been in hospital twice, and we had a nasty couple of weeks where we thought both boys had been exposed to tuberculosis. It now seems the driver probably doesn’t have TB, but no one is any closer to figuring out what he does have. According to our part-time nanny, “the spirits just want him to die.”

But in between all this lurching from mini-medical-drama to mini-medical-drama we’re doing well. It’s a life of extremes here. I really don’t love the fact that last week we found two little poisonous snakes inside the house, but there are plenty of things I do love about living in Laos.

All the help we have, for starters. You guys, money might not be able to buy you happiness, but when you’re the mother of two young children it can sure buy a healthy measure of sanity.

During the days I have someone at the house who can help with the kids most of the time. It’s impossible to over-state how much more I enjoy being a mother with an extra set of hands (or two) around. This sort of help means that I can work most mornings while Dominic is at preschool. I can grocery shop without lugging a baby around on my hip in the tropical heat. I can make dinner without a cranky baby tugging on my leg and bellowing to be held. I generally don’t do any dishes, laundry, or cleaning.

Cue the angel choir.

It’s not just good for me – the kids benefit, too. When our night guard arrives about 4:30, Dominic runs straight outside to greet him. They usually spend the next hour or so playing in the sandpit, hacking leaves off banana trees, digging in the garden, and generally pottering around together.

And Alex is adored within an inch of his life. I have never seen a culture where everyone – women and men – are so universally warm and capable with babies and young children. Alex and Dominic will go off with our staff to playgroups at other people’s houses and all sorts of inexplicable and wonderful things happen there. I’ve seen video proof, for example, that Dominic will eat raw broccoli if a playgroup nanny feeds it to him. 

What else do I love about life here at the moment?

The kids turned 1 and 3 two weeks ago, and we had a lovely party to celebrate complete with construction cake (total Mama win).

Dominic has just started to do weekday mornings at a Montessori preschool five minutes from our house. There are still tears every morning when I leave him there, but I love what I’ve seen of the school and I think he’ll really benefit from being there.

I love the new routine I’m settling into of working in the mornings and spending time with the kids/life admin in the afternoon. 

I love loving that there are a dozen other mamas nearby I can call at the drop of a hat for play-dates, advice, or just to say hello.

I love that when I can’t get to making dinner for whatever reason, I can call up Mike and get him to pick up takeout on the way home from work. We can get two lots of pad thai and mango & coconut sticky rice for $10, or grilled chicken and sticky rice from the street stalls for less than that. At the local market we can buy a week’s worth of vegetables for about $20, and I also love that our kids are as comfortable shopping here as in Woolworths.

Despite what it’s done to the local roads, I love the rainy season storms – the way the clouds roll in dramatically and the rain sheets down with ferocity that’s straight out of the Old Testament.

I love that we’re taking a week’s holiday next month… to Phuket in Thailand. Because from Laos, Phuket is our local getaway and the easiest place to go with young kids.

And after the way this year started, I love that Mike’s first six months post-cancer scans came back looking good. I love seeing him back at work in a role he enjoys, slowly getting stronger and picking up some steam as the weeks tick past. Hooray for life post-cancer.

What are you loving about your life right now?